All Is Grist For The Mill

Grist is grain related. From corn. I'm not a big fan of grains. Grains are bad for you. However, today I heard that saying "All is grist for the mill." I hadn't heard it in a long time. It's one of those phrases that I've always just let slide. I kinda got the gist of it and stopped thinking about it.

What's "grist," anyway? It's "a quantity of corn to be ground." Doesn't say all that much until you put it in context. "All is grist for the mill" means everything can be made useful. It comes from the guy that owned the local mill to which everyone came to have their corn ground. He knew that all corn was valuable that corn's owner. They needed it ground, and he needed the money that he charged for the grinding. All is grist for the mill.

But, can everything be made useful? To do that, you have to keep looking at it from different angles until you find a way. I encourage you to do that. Keep looking.

Now, I'm not really talking about physical items. What use is a broken glass? It's a stretch to toss it into a recyle bin and say it'll be useful someday. Don't waste precious brainpower on that stuff. It's the mental stuff that's good to "look at." Lessons learned and all that stuff.

The other day, I was working with someone who I don't particularly like. He's asked for my help, so I agreed to meet him. I was able to help him. However, while we were together, he solved a rather annoying little technical problem rather quickly, after I was ready to just let someone else handle it. That sobered me for a moment and then I made a mental note about the fix.

Later, in my car, I thought about writing that fix down. I got out my PDA and made a new entry. Then, I stopped. I already new that fix. Why hadn't I fixed it on my own? Because it was annoying and I was being lazy, that's why. I stopped writing. After all, "don't be lazy" would really be the only thing to write, and I wasn't really sure where to file that in my PDA.

Today, after the whole "grist" thing, I thought about this guy again. Now that I think about it, he's always been the furthest thing from lazy. In fact, he's a go-getter. So, why did he ask me for help that day. Because he needed something, some knowledge, that he didn't have. That's why we ask others for help. They've got something that we don't have. In fact, I'll bet I annoy him, too: He took the initiative and fixed a problem that I was willing to let slide. I'm the grist for his mill.

We can all learn from the miller. We can all learn from each other and our own mistakes and experiences.

There's grist all around is. I guess grains aren't always bad for us.

Big Fish in a Small Pond

While I certainly can't take credit for that line, I'm going to start to actually look for small "ponds" to visit.

I belong to 24 Hour Fitness. It has no pool, so I can't continue this pond analogy any further, really. But, I like 24 Hour Fitness, and at a mere $7 a month, I see no reason to change. Yes, $7!

Also, I can use a lot of their clubs, all around Southern California. There's one practically around every corner. My favorite has been the one in Torrance, near my Dad's house. It's the only one where guys and girls deadlift (other than me). The other ones have squatters, now and then, but never deadlifters. These guys aren't huge, but they sure lift a lot compared to me. I liked going to this gym and chatting and learning from these guys, who are pretty nice, to boot.

Today, I went to one near my office. No one was deadlifting. There was a guy squatting. A lot of weight, too. He was very large, but not in the good way... By and large, this gym is filled with guys doing a bunch of pansy-ass isolation exercises in the curl section. The bench area was crowded, too, of course. Groups of guys working out together/wasting their time... Most of the guys were sorta "puffy" lookin', too.

However, this gym is simply filled with girls. Girls, women, chicks, whatever. Fit ones. Even the trainers (the girl trainers) were mighty fine looking.

Now, I'm pretty shy. When a girl looks at me, I most likely to think she's looking at the clock behind me. I kept looking for the clocks. There were none. It dawned on me that I was one of the guys in the best shape there. This is new for me.

Now, I'm not all that strong. Some of these guys were far stronger, but they simply aren't doing any of the lifts I'm doing, so since I'm doing all these things no one recognizes, I'm lookin' good! Dumbbell snatches of 80lbs. No ones doing ANY snatches. I win. In fact, people were asking "what's he doing?" One guy says he can't press anything near 80lbs... I'm lookin' good at this gym.

Anyhow, a strange thing happened (other than being looked at). I lifted more weight.

Can it really be true that checking out and getting checked out can effect your lifts?

I hope my new friends in Torrance won't miss me too much (since I was likely making THEM look good), but this is my new pond. ...and it couldn't be much smaller!

Opportunity Cost, Freedom, and the Price of Things

"There's no such thing as a free lunch." -- Milton Friedman, Nobel Laureate in Economics, after he was asked to sum up his economic philosophies.

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I was listening to Dennis Prager, on the radio, between appointments. The hour's subject was something like "Everything has a Price."

I certainly believe this. Go to work, don't go to work. Both have price. The list goes on. People kept calling in with challenges, but Dennis was right. Everything does have a price.

The challenge is two-fold. 1. Acknowledge to yourself that everything has a price. 2. Ask yoursef to consider the price of your action, decision, etc. Do what you want, but you need to know that there's a price.

I've been doing this, for a while, with my food choices. Eat that cake, and you have to cut out something else. Actually, you don't. But the cost is either fat gain or a slowing of my current fat loss. Don't want that... So, do I just cut some calories? Do I cut specific things to try to balance things out? Are there other, optional foods, that I'm planning to eat that I should now, not eat? I can exercise more, too. Do I have the time for that today? This never ends, it seems. The price for eating the cake seems extreme. I'm sure I'm making more of it than necessary. Some cake, every once in a while, won't kill me.

It's not as important to look at the cake and make the right decision on eating the cake or not, or making up for the cake, later. The important part is acknowledging that eating that cake has a price. If you accept the price (whichever price you settle on), you're okay.

A caller called in and told Dennis about a concept called "Opportunity Cost." You can't do two things at once. When you do one thing, you aren't doing anything else. What's the cost of what you aren't doing. Opportunity Cost.

So, I'm pretty clear on the Opportunity Costs for the foods I eat and don't eat. I've been weighing my food choices (pun intended) for about three years now. I suppose I actually did it all of my life, I merely chose to accept too high a price and got fat...

The last called made an excellent point. I'll paraphrase, until I can get his exact phrasing.

"Freedom is knowing the prices and making your own choices." --Some Caller to the Dennis Prager Show.

I was free make my food and fitness choices. I chose being fat. Now, I choose to be fit. I decide to not get up and go workout. But, time to start looking at my choices and their prices. I'm free to make my own choices and I suffer the consequences; good or bad.

So, in short, I choose not to eat the cake. ...except on someone's birthday, or when I can ditch tonight's bread, or I can take a little pudge where it won't show, or I've got some time to exercise a little more, or it's my Mom's cheesecake and it would hurt her feelings if I don't eat it, despite the fact that she packed it for me to take home and has no idea that I could just toss it and not eat it. But, not eat the cheesecake? Come on!

Finding A Religion

What do you do when you want to be religious?

I was born a Catholic, I suppose. I was baptised a few days later. But, I never really followed it.

In high school, I realized I didn't really believe in God. My best friends were all Catholic, though. In college, I was even in the Newman Club, with all my Catholic friends. It was a lot of fun, and I enjoyed the debates with my friends, as well. Of course, they knew my soul was doomed, but didn't seem to hold that against me.

I was never one of THOSE athiests. The ones that are angry. I just didn't believe. I always thought that religious Christians and Jews tended to be better people than the typical athiest. I still do, although there are good athiests and bad Christians and Jews. Religion makes us better.

So, now I believe again. I just don't know what I believe. I believe Jesus existed. Do I believe he was (or is) the son of God or is God? No. I even have a hard time thinking that it's important to believe that. In fact, why would God care if I believed in that aspect?

While I'm sure God's happy to have people be good FOR him, isn't he happy that the people who are good sort of "on their own" are good, too? It's results, right? Who's the better person? The guy who doesn't steal the candy because he thinks it's wrong or the guy who sees the security camera pointing his way?

I'm not deep enough to keep this kinda stuff up, but suffice it to say that I've come to my senses and believe in something higher. Now, if you believe in the Judeo Christian God, but don't think Jesus is the son of God, what does that make you? Jewish? I'm not even thinking that a Messiah is going to come, someday. So, not Jewish.

It feels wrong to just go to any old church. I feel like a Christian, at heart. But, with a million churches to walk into, how do you know which is right or wrong for you?

Gospel churches look fun. But, you don't really go to church for fun.

I like traditions, too. Something that seems sort of "official" and long-ago-established. Catholic or Lutheran, maybe?

What I really want is that little church on Little House on the Prairie. Something like that one. But, since Minnesota (and the 1800s) are pretty far away, I'll have to settle for something around here.

The phone book seems like a strange way to find a church.

What's the purpose?

I realize that this is only my fourth post, but I've started thinking about what I'd like this blog to be. Obviously, it's public, but who's going to read it? Is it something that I make my family aware of? Friends? Both?

The blog is sort of a new thing. Anyone can make one. A prospective mate may find out about it. Knowing that all of your thoughts are right there on the table, what does that encourage you to write or not write? Your ex-wife may read it. How much emotion do you want to pour out?

In the past, the medium closest to the blog might have been considered the newspaper column. If the column was successful, a LOT of folks would read it. Family, friends, enemies, strangers, etc. But, what you wrote was often taken with a grain of salt. After all, it was chiefly for entertainment or educational purposes: The columnist was trying to get his message across to his readers. Change a few minds, perhaps.

What's the goal of a blogger? It ranges from the guy who wants to be that columnist, to the guy that wants to keep his family and friends informed about his life, to the guy who's so full of himself that he thinks everyone should know his inner thoughts. I'm sure there are other types, too. Most bloggers are a mixture at the beginning. The mix will likely change over time, but all types will still be represented, to one degree or another, in every blog.

What I do know about myself will help with what goes into this blog. Here's a list of a few things that I will improve on:

1. Communication. A big part of my failed marriage was because I didn't step up to the plate where communication was concerned. I didn't want the confrontation, so I put it off. Often, I put it off until it was too late, forgotten, or the issue "dissappeared." It never really went away, but somehow, I deemed that it was no longer an issue that needed discussing. Bad idea, all around.

2. See #1, above. All other problems of significance are rooted in the above issue. By not communicating, I lost the relationship with my wife. My extended family is still there, but since I never really communicated with them well, either, that's gotta start from scratch, too.

So, obviously, this blog is about communication. How and with whom is still to be fully determined...

Testing Blackberry Blogging

Is it working? I suppose it is!

The romance of bad food

Not food that tastes bad. Food that's bad for you. I won't even go into the "why the food is bad for you" thing. If you don't know that so much of what we eat is bad for us, then have another bite.

Every day, I drive by all sorts of places that I long to go into, despite the fact that the food would be bad for me. Food that I've virtually given up eating. These places are mostly bakeries or cafe's. Not the big cake and cookie style bakery. Those I can easily pass by. I'm talking about the ones with nice looking little tables in the sun. They look like the cafes and bakeries that I imagine I'd find on a trip to Europe. They serve little cups of coffee in actual, solid cups, rather than paper or foam. On the plates are little slices of cake or pasty and maybe some fruit. These places are hard to pass by. But, I do...

One day, I'll go in. I plan to go there. Or, should I say I have planned to go there, many times. I've even saved my calories for a little splurge, yet something's always stopped me.

The one that temps me the most is called "Black Forest Bakery." I'll bet they even have "German Chocolate Cake," the likes of which doesn't actually exist in Germany. But, I've been to the Black Forest once. I had some cake and coffee there, too. It is a fine memory. Sitting in the sun in some village, who's name escapes me, having a treat and coffee with my dad and sister. I remember that the cake was small and so was the cup of coffee. That didn't matter. It was good. Quality. What if this cafe, down the road here, has huge slices of cake and a big cup of coffee, instead? Will my memory of my visit to Germany be ruined or made better? Best to keep driving.

There's so much to say on the subject that I just don't know where to begin or end. I can ramble more, but sometimes it's better just to point the stuff out. So, here it is: By and large, people in the world are satisfied with a little slice of cake and a small cup of coffee, enjoyed slowly, sitting in the sun, with family or friends. I want that. I don't know if I can have that again.

I've never been to Italy. If I see an Italian Cafe, I'll pull over.

1st post

Feels a bit stupid, having a blog. It's mostly for me. Sort of a journal.

As much as I like the idea of having a paper journal, it's impractical. I buy them, then carry them around, finally putting them on a shelf, never to be used. I don't know what to write, for one. Putting words on paper seems be require some important words. I don't have those, so I never start. This seems different.

Plus, I tend to be long winded on my web forum posts. Often, it's something that I want to say, not necessarily what anyone wants to read. No better place than this, huh?

Ok. 1st post done and out of the way. It can only go on from here.