Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Why?

Why do they have standard and handicapped urinals? Mount them all low.

Monday, January 29, 2007

Foodborne Illness

I have one. A serious one. I don't know when I got it, but I got it a long time ago.

Symptoms (in no particular order)

  1. Always hungry, even when full
  2. Sad makes me hungry
  3. Food makes me feel guilty
  4. I love to eat delicious food
  5. I love to eat good food
  6. I will eat pretty much any food
  7. I find cheesecake delicious and easy to make
  8. I notice that doughnuts aren't all that good, but I love them
  9. I find any box of cookies to be a single serving size

I feel sane, so obviously it's not me. It's my illness.

Treatment (in no particular order)

  1. Think of food as fuel.
  2. Food doesn't have to be delicious. In fact, better to not be...
  3. You know those monks that don't talk? Smugly sitting there, not talking? Well, I'm like a monk that's going hungry. But not really hungry. Just a little. Cindy Sheehan on her "hunger strike" hungry.
  4. Prepare food in advance. But, don't stop there. Put it in containers, ready to eat, in advance. There can be no excuse for NOT taking my food with me (or, I'll find it).
  5. Keep a compliance chart. I used to do this and stopped. Starting again (see?).
  6. Find a way to drag my ass out of "sad."

There appears to be no cure, so make sure to always wash your hands before eating and refrigerate leftovers promptly. Don't catch this.

Saturday, January 20, 2007

old dream

I just remembered a recurring dream that I used to have as a child.

I was in a dark, cold, damp place. Like a cave or something. I was always cold and uncomfortable. In the dream, I always tried to sleep in a curled up position to keep warm. No blanket. I was waiting for something that never came.

Last night, I fell asleep watching a movie. The couch wasn't to comfortable. I was cold. No blanket. Of course, I was too lazy to get up.

This morning, all the sudden that dream popped into my head. It's strange, because I think I actually still might have that dream and just never remember it. It feels too familiar to be just from childhood.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

The "Nice" Horn

I think cars should have two horns. The normal, loud horn, for when you need to use the horn, then a second, nicer sounding horn. This would be a standard, pleasant sounding thing that every car would have. You would use this when you're sitting behind someone at the light and they don't notice it changed.

The normal horn is so loud and shocking that the person in front gets embarrassed AND thinks you're an asshole. It's hard to just do a short, little, nice toot on the traditional horn. I have to press so hard that it ends up being a huge blast of horn. By default, they would think I'm an ass.

The nice horn would make life more pleasant. Like a remote controlled "excuse me."

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

A Realization

What did I realize? Things don't have to be so bad. I don't have to be lonely.

A rash of retirement parties and after hours get-togethers has reminded me that I have plenty of friends at work. But, just like college and work (before marriage), most of my friends are women. I'm good with that.

I've found myself hanging out with the groups of women at the parties. How can that be bad? The only guy in a group of women.

Not that I don't get along well with guys, but for some reason it's easier to stick with the women.

Maybe it's the aversion to watching and talking about sports? My passion for cooking?

Now, if I get the group to include more women that liked to lift, mountain bike ride, and talk about science fiction, I'd be set. Good looking would be a plus, as well. Baby steps...

Sunday, January 14, 2007

miscellaneous

It's been a while. Sometimes I've got nothing. I've been a little down. Down and busy.

Had a good day with my Son on friday, while my girl went off to a concert with her Mom and some friends. Fished a bit. Fed ducks. Watched Pokemon. Too much Pokemon.

I had sort of a nice weekend, hanging out and just playing things by ear. Saw a movie (Children of Men). It was excellent. Sand Challenge, this morning. Sat back and relaxed with a cup of coffee and a magazine, afterwards. Then, later, my mood changed. Started feeling down and lonely. Got ready and went to the gym.

The gym was cold. I had no sweats because the gym is never cold. No matter how hard I worked, I never really warmed up. I kept wanting to stop the workout. I felt pretty strong and was able to lift more than I normally do, but it was unsatisfying. Usually, the workout breezes by. It dragged on, today.

On top of the "dragging on," I knew that my leg stuff was all higher rep stuff. I just didn't have that in me. So, I just dropped the plan and did some heavier leg stuff. No biggie. It was primarily an upper body day, anyway.

I feel fat, too. Too many invites to too many gatherings with too many treats. I originally planned to nip that in the bud, starting tomorrow. But, I've already started. What's the point of waiting? I ate tonight, but it was all good and not too much of it, either.

Tomorrow's a new day.

Friday, January 5, 2007

Incredulous

It's a funny word. And, it describes the general state of my father.

in·cred·u·lous
Pronunciation: (")in-'kre-j&-l&s, -dy&-l&s
Function: adjective
Etymology: Latin incredulus, from in- + credulus credulous
1 : unwilling to admit or accept what is offered as true : not credulous : SKEPTICAL
2 : INCREDIBLE
3 : expressing incredulity

Almost daily, I come home to some my Dad, expressing incredulity. Last week, it was Star Wars, Episode III (he still doesn't get that Anakin is Darth Vader...), this week, the trash men missed our recycle bin ("RIDICULOUS! Their whole job is trash!"), and in October, he went off to vote in November's election, only to find that the polling location didn't have booths setup yet ("Come back in two weeks, Sir." ("Why did they send me this ballot, if it wasn't time to vote!?!?")).

Virtually every day, I come home to him shaking his head incredulously at some common, everyday occurrence. Virtually every day, I come home and find myself shaking my head incredulously at my old man. I didn't realize that until today. We all have our things, don't we?

Wednesday, January 3, 2007

Internet Acting

Contrary to popular opinion, on the internet, everyone is what they want to be. Some people are the same, some are not. Some act normally, some act up, some just act a part.

I might be like Cyrano, with all the talkin' and sophisticatedness that I hold back in person. He had the nose. I've got other unusually large parts.

I'm not saying people take on roles, although there are a few... I'm saying that with the likelyhood of never meeting the people at the other "end," you can just be yourself. More likely, be the self you wish you had the guts to be.

I think this effects the shy and bashful more than the loud and obnoxious. Loud Guy may think he should tone it down, but with nothing to stop him, he's just as likely to be "loud" on the internet as in real life.

I, on the otherhand, can talk to anyone I want. It's easy. The opposite of me.

It was once suggested that I go to a blackberry party. Each table has a big number posted and a blackberry. It lets you "chat" from table to table. I can't imagine a more horrible experience. Who can this concept be for? Not the shy people, that's for sure. And, Loud Guy doesn't need a blackberry, does he?
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